December 24, 2020
As you visit your relatives this holiday season, are you concerned about what you see? Should you be?
We recommend first addressing what we call the “four pillars.” If something happens in one of these four areas: medications, driving, finances, and legal, there can be serious consequences for a person’s future. Taking prescriptions incorrectly, falling, getting in a car accident, or getting exploited can completely change the trajectory and life expectancy of your loved one.
So what should you look for?
- Look for changes – If your parent has always had a shortcoming in one of these areas and it’s nothing new, it shouldn’t be concerning. If, on the other hand, your parent has always been meticulous about something and is now slipping, you should investigate further.
- Check the fridge – How old is the food inside? Are there groceries, or just takeout leftovers? Is there nutritious food?
- Watch for mobility issues – How well are they walking, bending, lifting? How often do they reach for a countertop or wall for support?
- Look at their mail and bills – Are bills pilling up? Is there a lot of unopened mail? Is it hard to distinguish what has or has not been paid? Is their checkbook register legible and current? Do you recognize the names of people or businesses they’ve paid?
- Review their medication system – Are pills stored in the same location or scattered around the house? Do they have a good system for knowing if they took a dose or not? How many medications are they on?
- Let them drive you – Does just suggesting that make you uncomfortable? Do they make lots of sudden stops? Are they aware of how they are impacting drivers around them? Are they driving too slowly and cautiously? Can they turn their neck to look backwards?
- Ask about friends, visitors, or “helpers” – Who is coming into the house? Are there new people in their life that you don’t know? Who would they call if you cannot be there?
- Review legal documents together – Do they have advance directives? Who is designated, and is that who they currently want? Where are the documents are stored? Is there a will or estate plan? When was the last time these were reviewed by an attorney?
If you find there are concerns in one or more of these areas, you may want to delve deeper. Why are those changes happening? What can you do to help support your loved one and keep them safe? Some issues can be resolved with just a little research and diligence: purchase a fall button, set up a pill box, put bills on up autopay or hire a Daily Money Manager, visit your elder law attorney. But some issues are more complex or you may encounter resistance when you try to address these concerns.
If you are unable to resolve an issue, or need help properly identifying the full scope of concerns, call a professional for an assessment. Aging Life Care professionals like ours are educated and experienced in the this field and held to the Aging Life Care Association’s Code of Ethics and Standards of Practice. They will conduct a comprehensive assessment that identifies all the needs and create a care plan that gives you solutions. They can also help implement those solutions if you are encountering resistance or trying to manage from afar. Contact us for virtual or in-person consultations to keep your loved one safe, healthy, and happy.
We wish you a safe and merry Christmas, a happy New Year! We’re looking forward to 2021!
